No, she's getting her hair done.

Well, poor you. You have to sit through yet another weekly Ben email. Before we officially begin, I'd just like to "grab that one percent" as my humble brother, Joseph put it. The answer is... A freshly fallen rain in a dense forest. (This answer, of course, is liable to change in the future).

Now, we can begin.

The week, as I'm sure you could've guessed, was filled to the brim with activity. Don't worry folks, I'm not just sitting around here. (Well, right now I guess I am, but... That's the exception rather than the rule). I participated in my first batch of exchanges this week. I went with the district leader, while my two companions went with his. It was pretty good. I got to ride a bike, which was fun. There was, of course, one little snag. The district leader, you see, is actually a Spanish missionary. So, instead of being able to loosely follow what was happening (Like I can usually do in Mandarin), I got exactly nothing. I basically sat there, mimicking the general facial expressions of people in the room. (Smiling when they do, etc.) We did do a little street contacting though, but nobody really wanted to talk to us. There were a few ladies who we thought were Chinese, so we went over to talk to them. Aaaand, they only spoke Korean. Fun times, to say the least. We also went on a merry chase after "the Al of Al's Toy Barn", if you know what I mean. (It was really just some guy whose house we couldn't find, and when we finally did find it someone answered the door and said that the person we were looking for didn't live there anymore). From what was told to me, the conversation went something like this:

"Hello, We're missionaries from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Is (says name) here?"

"What? Beer?"

"No, (Repeats above)"

"Oh, he doesn't live here anymore." (Closes door).

Of course, this entire dialogue was in Spanish, so I don't actually know if it's true, but... "Now you've got a little taste of what I do. Pretty dang exiting."

Other than that, we did a lot more finding this week. We actually got someone referred to us who might be interested, so we'll see how that turns out. With the Spring Festival coming up, a lot of the people we try to knock on their doors are not home, and a lot of the people who we call either don't answer or say that they are going to China for the holiday. We are reaping some rewards out of it though, because President Durham (That's my mission president, by the way) gave us special permission to eat with some members tomorrow for the holiday. (usually, we can only eat with members on the weekend.)

I am glad that one of the two Super Bowls I'll be missing was, quote, "the most boring Super Bowl in the history of the world." 10-3. Oof. At least my prediction of the winner was right. Early prediction for next year: Chiefs over Saints.  Mark my words, it's gonna happen.

Now, I am about to do something that part of me really doesn't want to do. This thing, that I do with much hesitation, is give you the address to where you should send packages. The reason I'm so hesitant about this  is that, A) I don't want to receive a ton of packages, and B) it's mission policy to have everything sent to the mission office, which is out of our area, in a completely different city, and we never go there. So please, please, please keep it light.

Elder Ben Rivera

California Oakland/ San Francisco Mission

4945 Lincoln Way

Oakland, CA 94602

Please heed my remarks on this subject, I beg you.

Now, what else....

Nothing? OK, bye.

-The man who coined the phrase: "Well that looks like a young William Howard Taft on Tuesday!"

P.S. Oh yeah! I forgot to tell you about The dinner we had on Saturday. Mostly I just wanted to say that my humble brother, Joseph, would have been very, very disappointed with the mashed potatoes. They were chunkier than any others I've seen. (Compared to the MTC, though, it was basically manna).

P.P.S. I hope you know, takes a lot of effort to forge these "post-scripts, so I hope they're appreciated.

P.P.P.S. Oh, yeah, one drunk guy on the street did impart us with these words of wisdom. He started off by asking what "tambien" meant, and then said things like:

"You know, tambien, that's the original name of Christianity"

"There are only 100 colors, and yellow is the coldest"

"No matter how cold you are, you always still have a ton of heat inside you, because cold doesn't exist"

"Sound doesn't exist, not even percussion instruments can make sound"

He was a fun guy, to say the least.

P.P.P.P.S. Gil-Galad was an elven king

                Of him the harpers sadly sing

                The last whose realm was fair and free

                Between the mountains and the sea

                His sword was long, his lance was keen

                His shining helm afar was seen

                The countless stars in heaven's field

                Were mirrored in his silver shield

                But long ago he rode away

                And where he dwelleth none can say

                For into darkness fell his star

                In Mordor, where the shadows are.